Writes


Letters
Company Pen
Betting On Trump
How Many Toilets?
Lost Nickle
Dear Airline
Dear Senator Vasconcellos
Dear CBS
Dear Carolina Panthers
10 Questions From Americans
Dear Toys R Us...
Small On Top?
The Benjagon
Use Those Weather-Sticks
Einstein Didn’t Know His Barber Could Cook
I Want Your Clutter
Hello, Coca-Cola?
The Question About The Bill
10 Interview Questions


Dreams
Do I Own A Snake?
Fourth Is Enough
7 Year Living Room
Water Bowl
Overboard
Team 3D and The Finger
Coin Bringer
Turtle Dancing and Jell-O World
Team 3D vs. The French
Almost Spiderman
Killing The Old For Books
Closet Snake
Walking Out
Outside My Casino
Todd Took My Beer
Wednesdayding Lake
Vegas Clean Out
U.S. History Quiz in Tijuana
Uri and I vs. Lewis and Tyson
Team 3D 'Cleans' House
Shopping School
Talking to G-d in a Toy Aisle
Witness to a Dream
Bill Clinton's Pep Talk
Team 3D and the 3D Girls vs. The Purple Maori Theater Seat Thieves
North Africa vs. South Africa
Team 3D vs. The Invisible Yellow Llama -or- Zoo Island
Sparing Bonnie Hunt
Quarters for Dogs
Telling Her Off
Killing in Defense
Team 3D vs. The Ozone Blob
Mega Work Dream
Risking Life and Limb Over World War Two Germany
Pastry Bunnies
Dave and Ben vs. Ted Danson
Cory Car Club
Team 3D in New York
Yael's Book Opening Sword
Ten Foot Tall Piece of Fridayed Chicken
Web Hostage
Sky God
Team 3D vs. The Mall Wave
Nose Vines
U.F.I. Mining Town
Girls in Torture-land
Benjamin's Elevator Shaft Shower and the Golden Cross
Me, Kenn, Some Russian Guy, and Fire...
Team 3D vs. The Storm Crane
Two Dreams
Team 3D Detectives
Two Things Wrong
The Musical
A Shave and a Spot
Hawaii 500
Moving In
Japan's Crack Super Parachute Commando Squadron!

 
Saturday, May 15, 2004
Water Bowl
 
Given my tendency for dreams in which my friends and I are blessed with strange, yet wonderful super-powers – dreams in which we team up to use these powers against a silly, yet common good – I’m surprised that I had this dream last night.

Heck, this is even a dream for those psychological types to analyze. There’s not much to analyze about my friends and I using our powers to get to the front of a line in a candy store – that’s just plain silly, but this is one of those dreams that totally means something. I don’t know what, but I know it’s something good. Why? When I woke up I felt good. When I thought back to what I was dreaming I felt even better. Anyway, here it goes…

Lisa and I had just bought the new house. No work has been done yet. At its very simplest, the family that lived there before us had completely moved out, and the house was most plainly just left empty.

We were sitting in front of each other in the middle of the living room floor; our legs crossed Indian-style and a very, very, very large china bowl between us. The bowl was massive – large enough that if I wanted to, I guess, curled up I could fit in it.

Off to the side of us, to my right and to Lisa’s left, was a large source of the purest water you’ve ever seen. Lisa was full of life, laughing and giggling and telling me about her day. She was very excited, barely able to keep her seat and to keep from moving around. As she sat there, going on and on with colorful stories and humorous punch lines, she kept putting water into the bowl – one tablespoon at a time.

I remember sitting there not being able to get enough of her hysterics and laughter. My sides were hurting with laughter, and my eyes were tearing up a bit from my being able to physically absorb only ‘so much’ of humorous setting. Through it all, however, one spoon at a time, she reached over to the side, scooped up some water, and without spilling a drop carefully put it into the bowl between us.

The bowl was very large – perfectly round and smooth, purely white with a bold, yet intricate, blue pattern around the inner lip. When Lisa put water in the bowl, I remembered it shimmered some, like glitter, but then it just smoothed out quickly and, pooled at the bottom, waited for the next spoonful.

And that’s about it – waiting with Lisa who was just an explosion of happiness, watching her slowly fill my bowl with crisp, clear water. The end.