Once the twelve of us 'youngsters' get to the room, we find none other than Bill Clinton waiting for us - in drag. We found out later that he was in drag in order to move about the public in disguise, but that's not nearly the wierdest part. When the dozen of us is finally seated, the door the room is closed and Bill begins on his rant. With a black marker in his hand, towards the right side of the board, he draws a small circle. Then he drags on for a couple minutes explaining, in no specific detail, the important significance of that circle. Once done speaking, he eyes us as if he were the first to figure out the answer to some age-old problem. Then he raises an index finger with the body language that suggests that not only what he said was pure genius, but that there's plenty more. He draws another circle. He explains it. He lets it sink in for a bit. When he thinks we're ready to shoulder the burden of yet another blast of intellect, he draws another circle. And he explains it. And on and on it goes. Circle. Explanation. Praise of his own genius. Circle. Explanation. Praise of his own genius. A couple dozen cirlces are neatly grouped towards the right end of the dry-erase board now, and good old Bill's standing there with his arms folded and his cheeks red from smiling at his own scholarly discoveries. He's made no sense thus far, and the 'explanation' he's given in reference to each and every circle was about their roundness and that they're only black because he chose to use a black marker - thus keeping them from being any other color. Idiot. But that wasn't enough. When we all thought he was done, we began to knod excitedly and mumble about how smart and interesting what we just saw was, and that we were sure to tell everyone we knew about it. We thought it was over. He raises his index finger again, along with an eyebrow and a knowing grin. He draws a huge circle on the left side of the board, tells us to wait just a minute for the one thing that'll pull it all together so it would make sense, and draws lines to connect the big cirlce to the little ones. A line from the big circle to connect to a little one. Then another line from the big circle to connect to another little one. When he was done, none of the little circles connected to eachother, but they all connected to the big circle. He explained that to us, and went further to clarify that it was his will that the ink in the marker was used in such a fashion. I was stunned. But just as I was about to open my mouth, Bill makes a hand gesture to bring in someone new. A girl walks in, a Polish girl, and she begins to sing. Nearly every note that comes out of her mouth, Bill applauds and looks at us with that, "Eh!? Ain't she somethin'!?" look. She goes on for about four or five songs, all the while one would catch Bill nodding off in between roaring applause. When the girl finishes, she leaves. Secret Service then flood the room, restraining us and hand-cuffing us to our seats. Why? So Bill would be assured a safe environment for him to depart from. Once he was safely out of the room, we were released and sent back to our desks. |
