Once in a while, they just come to me...
Date: Thu, 11 Oct 2007 04:26:16 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: PLEASE PAY GOOD ATTENTION.
To: johnfrancisreed@yahoo.com
CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA
TINUBU SQUARE, VICTORIAISLAND, LAGOS-NIGERIA.
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
CENTRAL BANK OFNIGERIA
TINUBU SQUARE LAGOS
From the Desk Of:
Prof. Charles C. Soludo
Executive Governor (CBN)
Office: (234) -1- 433 4922.
Attention: Mr. John Reed,
Sir,
RE: UNPAID CONTRACT SUM – WHY YOU HAVE NOT SUCCEEDED.
After waiting to hear from you or your Nigeria partners for a long time now. I decided to make this direct approach to you in other not to let it be as if I have anything in mind against you. I do not know if you have asked yourself why each time the release of this fund is approved, all of sudden, the payment will be stopped or one problem or the other will come up. If you have not asked this question or you do not know, this is an opportunity for me to tell you.
Sometime ago, your Nigerian friend I mean the people that introduced you to the project approached me through my dear wife who works with the Federal Ministry of Finance and asked me to assist them conclude a money transfer deal they had with you, they requested me to assist them by removing the original contractor’s name, company’s name and your bank particulars from Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) Vetting and replacing them with your name and your bank details in order to make you appear as the rightful beneficiary of this funds. I agreed on conditions that they would pay me US$300,000 as soon as your name appears as the beneficiary. I did as agreed and demanded to be paid but your friends started giving me excuses. They even told me that you promised to send money to me, do you know that up till now, I have not received a single cent from them and have not set my eyes on any of them.
Based on their attitude, I decided to stop the funds release movement because I cannot be denied of my right in my own office considering the risk as it might affect my job. Secondly, I know the source of the funds that you did not execute any contract in Nigeria , although I am the only person privileged to know this information and it is a fact. Why I am making this clear to you is that I can see that you are still making frantic efforts to conclude this project. Now I am ready to forget the past. I do not need the US$300,000 any longer from you but a good compensation from your mind. I need your assurance that your colleagues will be totally kept out of this transaction.
I know quite well that none of them is aware of my new approach to you Stop spending your money unnecessarily to CBN Officers both here and overseas because you will not receive this money without my hand in it. I personally perfected the change of the documents at the very beginning and only I can perform it. The secret is that your partners failed to stamp duty your contract documents.
Finally, I need your promise that no official of the Central Bank of Nigeria will be aware of my involvement in this regard because of my position. Now re-assure me that you will be willing to compensate me. That you will assist my wife to establish a foreign account in your country where my compensation will be deposited. I am a man of my words, if you are ready to conclude this business with me, kindly Call +(234)-8033-449-613 so that I could give you more informations over this issue once and for all. But if the reverse is the case, do not bother yourself to reach me and forget about this money.
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Executive Governor
Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN).
Cell Phone: +(234)-8034382456
Date: Thu, 11 Oct 2007 13:13:11 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: PLEASE PAY GOOD ATTENTION.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
From the Desk Of:
Super Prof. John F. Reed
Super Executive Governor (NFL)
Attention: Regular Prof. Charles C. Soludo,
Sir,
RE: RE: UNPAID CONTRACT SUM - WHY I HAVE NOT SUCCEEDED.
I have been waiting to hear from you about me and my Nigerian partners. I don't know what my Nigerian partners told you, but it is all a lie. First of all, they're not Nigerian, they're Nigerianian. Second of all, I'm just an honest American Businessman trying to do some business.
You wrote a lot of long paragraphs, and I don't understand a thing you said, but I want you to know that I am willing to cooperate in any way necessary.
I want to help.
I want to cooperate.
I can't believe they gave you attitude. I would have totally stopped the fundds release movements. I just ate some Taco Bell, so I'm an EXPERT at movements. If you don't want the $300,000 anymore then just give it back and we can start this over.
Tell me what to do.
Also, I would very much like to assist your wife. She sounds like a fantastic woman who desperately needs some of my personal assistance. You cannot be in the room while I give your wife assistance, unless, of course, you're into that kind of thing. HOWEVER, henceforth, verily, make direct note that you may not assist your wife while I am assisting her for I don't want my foreign account to touch your foreign account, and I definitely do not want to mix deposits. Also, I will not assist your wife second - I assist her first or not at all.
I am a man of my word.
Super Prof. John F. Reed
Super Executive Governor (NFL)
Date: Fri, 12 Oct 2007 03:40:27 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: PLS CAREFULLY GO THROGH MY MAIL AND THE AGREEMENT AND GET BACK TO ME.
To: "John Reed"
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
Thanks for your swift response to my mail. After reading through your mail with clear understanding, I wish to notify that we have to go into Agreement before stating on a fresh note by securing all the vital documents related to this transfer.
Be aware that I did not even collect $300,000 from those that introduce you into this transaction and that is my reasons of stoping the release of this transfer.
Since you have agreed to work this out with me in confindence I am expecting the return agreement so as to proceed immediately. I have taken note of your position and picture, hoping to achieve this goal with you in good faith.
Call me on my cell phone as stated below once you receive this mail for clearifications.
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Executive Governor.
Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN).
Cell Phone: +(234)-8034382456
Date: Sat, 13 Oct 2007 12:57:22 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: PLS CAREFULLY GO THROGH MY MAIL AND THE AGREEMENT AND GET BACK TO ME.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Attn: Prof. Charles Soludo,
I am very interested in 'swift action'. Which reminds me - how is your wife? Tell her I said hello.
What do you mean you don't have $300,000? It's ok - I don't have it either! Just kidding, yes I do. Actually, I probably piss away that much money over breakfast.
I agree to work this out with you in confidence and I am going to return the agreement to you immediately.
I called your cel phone and a woman answered. I DO NOT DO BUSINESS WITH WOMEN! Unless it's monkey business, in which case I DO NOT DO MONKEY BUSINESS WITH MEN!
Your cel phone number does not work.
+(234)-8034382666
Flatulence,
John F. Reed - Chronic Halitosis
Date: Fri, 12 Oct 2007 03:51:49 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: CONTRACT AGREEMENT.
To: "John Reed"
Central Bank of Nigeria
International Remittance Department
Lagos Office -- Tinubu Sqaure.
ATTN: PROF. JOHN F. REED,
THANKS FOR YOUR RESPONSE WHICH PROVES THAT YOU CAN WORK THIS OUT WITH ME.
CONTRACT AGREEMENT.
THIS CONTRACT AGREEMENT IS DRAWN BETWEEN PROF.CHARLES SOLUDO OF C.B.N AND PROF. JOHN F. REED, OF AMERICAN THIS DAY THE 12TH DAY OF OCTOBER 2007. THIS AGREEMENT AS STATED BELOW SHALL REMAIN BINDING ON BOTH PARTIES DURING THE COURSE OF THE SAID TRANSACTION.
(1) THAT THIS FUND WILL BE TRANSFERRED TO PROF. JOHN F. REED, AS THE BENEFICIARY OF THE SAID FUND.
(2) THAT THE FUND SHALL BE TRANSFERRED IMMEDIATELY AFTER ALL THE NECESSARY DOCUMENTATIONS HAVE BEEN TAKEN CARE OF BY BOTH PARTIES INVOLVED.
(3) THAT 30% OF THE TOTAL SUM WILL BE PAID TO PROF.CHARLES SOLUDO ACCOUNT IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE FUND HAS BEEN CREDITED INTO PROF. JOHN F. REED ’S NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT.
(4) THAT THE PARTIES INVOLVED SHALL ABIDE BY THIS AGREEMENT AND ANY FORM OF VIOLATION SHALL ATTRACT LITIGATION.
(5) THAT PROF.CHARLES SOLUDO AND PROF. JOHN F. REED, SHALL BEAR EQUAL COST RESULTING FROM THE PROCUREMENT OF THE ORIGINAL DOCUMENTATION OF THE CONTRACT, WHICH PROVES THAT PROF. JOHN F. REED IS THE BONAFIDE BENEFICIARY OF THE SAID FUND.
(6) THE DETAILED INFORMATIONS ABOUT PROF. JOHN F. REED ARE AS FOLLOWS.
(A) BANKING DETAILS:
(B) BANK ADDRESS:
(C) BENEFICIARIES NAME:
(D) PRIVATE/ FAX TELEPHONE NUMBERS:
(E) OCCUPATION:
(F) RESIDENTIAL MAILING ADDRESS:
(G) ATTACH A COPY OF YOUR PASSPORT PHOTOGRAPH
(H) THOMB PRINT ON THE SIGNED AGREEMENT.
SIGN:................. DATE:..................
PROF. JOHN F. REED.
BENEFICIARY.
SIGN:............... DATE:...................
PROF.CHARLES SOLUDO.
EXECUTIVE GOVERNOR,
CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA.
I AM GIVING YOU THIS EXPLAINATIONS BASED ON THE RECENT INSTRUCTION I RECEIVED FROM THE NEW PRESIDENT UMARU MUSA YAR ADUA, TO CLEAR ALL LEGITMATE FOREIGN CONTRACTORS OUTSTANDING FUND IN THIS LAST QUARTER OF THE YEAR.
I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND THAT BEFORE THE TRANSFER WILL BE COMMENCED, YOU WILL BE REQUIRED TO ENDORSE ALL THE ORIGINAL BANDED DOCUMENTS WHICH WILL BE SECURED FROM ALL THE MINISTRIES AND PARASTATALS GOVERNING OUR NATION, THIS WILL UNTHINCATE YOU AS THE ORIGINAL BENEFICIARY OF THE SAID FUND.
THIS ORIGINAL BANDED HARD COPY DOCUMENTS WILL BE SEND TO YOU VIA COURIER SERVICE ONCE THEY ARE SECURED AND YOU WILL BE ADVISED TO RETURN CERTAIN COPIES OF THE DOCUMENTS AFTER ENDORESMENT FOR THE FINAL SIGNATARY BY ME AND EFFECT THE TRANSFER INTO YOUR NOMINATED ACCOUNT WITHIN 72HOURS OF APPROVAL.
WITHOUT THIS GUIDELINES DO NOT BELIEVE THAT YOU WILL RECEIVE ANY FUND TRANSFER OF ANY KIND, I M GIVING YOU THIS SCREAT BECAUSE I KNOW A LOT OF FOREIGN CONTRACTORS HAS BEEN MISLEADED BY THOSE WHO INTRODUCED THEM INTO THE TRANSACTION FOR THERE SELFFISH INTEREST.
THEREFORE IF YOU ARE REALLY WILLING TO RECEIVE THIS FUND YOU MUST SIGN THIS ORIGINAL BANDED HARD COPIES, WITH THIS GUIDELINES MAINTAINED NOTHING WILL STOP YOU FROM RECEIVING THIS FUND CLAIM I ASSURED.
I AM IN THE BEST POSITION TO PUT YOU THROUGH FOR YOU STOP SPENDING FURTHER TO GHOST GOVERNMENT AND C.B.N OFFICIALS WITHOUT ACHIEVING RESULTS.
PLEASE BE INFORMED THAT IF YOU DO NOT ACCEPT THE CONDITIONS OF THIS AGREEMENT TO ENABLE ME HELP YOU TO RECOVER THIS FUND. THERE IS NOTHING I CAN DO NEXT.
I WAIT TO HEAR FROM YOU TO ENABLE ME PROCEED ACTION.
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Executive Governor
Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN).
Cell Phone: +(234)-8034382456
Date: Sat, 13 Oct 2007 13:41:08 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: CONTRACT AGREEMENT.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
ATTN: ADORABLE PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO,
I am responding to prove that I can work with you.
I am sending the proper documentation so I can be the beneficiary and become rish so we can all live on an island.
That said, let's get down to business:
1 - I am the beneficiary.
2- The fund will be transfered.
3 - 30%
4 - The abiding shall be abided by the abider.
5 - 50/50 between me and John F. Reed
6 - All the details are as follows:
(A) BANKING DETAILS: LARGE BANK OF SWITZERLAND
(B) BANK ADDRESS: Bern, Switzerland
(C) BENEFICIARIES NAME: John F. Reed
(D) PRIVATE/ FAX TELEPHONE NUMBERS: (212)867-5309
(E) OCCUPATION: Smooth Operator
(F) RESIDENTIAL MAILING ADDRESS: 16530 Ventura Blvd. #500 Encino, CA 91436
(G) ATTACH A COPY OF YOUR PASSPORT PHOTOGRAPH: attached
(H) THOMB PRINT ON THE SIGNED AGREEMENT: attached
I don't think you appreciate just how difficult it was for me to get my thumb print into this document for the preparation of the transaction and transfer. First I had to get it out of your wife, and believe you me that was a challenge all in itself - you know how she is. But then I put it in ink and then I stamped the form and scanned it and sent it to you and then 'back to work' I had to go. You know what I'm saying. I bet you do...
Please contact me as soon as the transfer is complete and the $300,000 has been moved to my account.
Do you still want 30%? I was feeling generous and thought I could give you 5% instead.
Dogs are barking,
John F. Reed - Now they're outside
Date: Wed, 17 Oct 2007 08:02:44 -0700 (PDT)
From: Send an Instant Message "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: CAN YOU UPDATE ME.
To: "John Reed"
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
I have waited to hear from you after series of telephone calls which could not be through due to your phone was permanently on vioce mail, does it mean you have not seen my last mail?.
I would want you to prove your willingness to seal this transaction with me as you have assured me. Remember We will not be able to achualize this goal without you playing your own roll.
Can you call me on my telephone line +234-803-4382-456 for further clearification.
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Executive Governor.
Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN).
Date: Wed, 17 Oct 2007 15:55:36 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: CAN YOU UPDATE ME.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Dear Prof. Charles Soludo (Executive Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN)),
First of all, don't you dare accuse me of not playing my own roll. I've been playing my roll, and playing it nightly. Every morning when I wake up there's my roll again, and I beat it like it owes me money. I play my role and I play it well.
Secondly, I would have loved to have called you back, but my voicemail is full. You called 392 times! My phone doesn't work anymore because you called too much. Please try to call me again.
Also, I've called your number this morning, twice yesterday, and once again two days prior to that. I think something's wrong with your phone number too. I called and it sounded like a very angry man was on the other end of the call. +234-803-4382-654 doesn't work.
Call me again, and call me now. And email me. Call me and email me and send me a photo of yourself to reassure me that this is real and genuine and assured and protected and confirmed.
This transaction is assured.
Ten Dimes,
John F. Reed - One Dollar
Date: Mon, 22 Oct 2007 05:11:48 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: PROF. JOHN PLS EXPEDIATE ACTIONS.
To: John F. Reed
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
Sequal to my last mail and the Agreement I received, I wish to notify you that all arrangement has been concluded, we are now waiting for your immedate cooperation.
Now I can be able to confined in you as a good family friend and I am here to assure you that you will never regreat knowing me provided you will abide by the rules of this Agreement.
Meanwhile, before writing this mail, I have called Barrister barrister Frank Madu, on a round table discussion concerning his living to Abuja for the securing of the hard copy documents on your behalf.
Finally, we have concluded that he should be living to Abuja by wednesday this week and in this case you and I have to work together to raise some money based on the signed Agreement.
Barrister Frank Madu, has stated his accomdation and flight fees including the estimated amount of ($6,400) for the procuring of the necessary hard copy documents as I have listed to him.
Right now I have given Barrister Frank, the sum of some money to cover his Air flight ticket and accomdation in Abuja, since he could spend three or four days to execute this job. In this local expenses I do this to prove my intergrity and humanity towards achieveing this goal.
On this estimated amount of ($6,400) for the documents, I have also raised the sum of ($2,200) and will be completing the balance of ($1.000) on before tommorow to keep his movement ready against wednesday. I will be expecting you to make available your own part of ($3,200) latest wednesday morning here to enable his movement possible by that wednesday.
Below is the name of his personal secretary as he stated to me which you are to use in sending the mentioned amount of ($3.200) based on our written Agreement of number five (5) via western union money transfer. Please do not send any amount to me or my persoanl secretary to avoid any body in my office to know my personal interest in the transaction.
Receiving name as follow:
NAME: ISRAEL ONUOHA.
ADDRESS: LAGOS NIGERIA.
TEST QUESTION: COLOR.
TEST ANSWER : GREEN.
CONTROL NUMBER: ...............
SENDER'S NAME: ..................
Sender's address:
Note: he advised that the receiving information should be send to his personal Email box: (barristerfrankmadu@excite.com) and you can also reach him on his mobile teelephone number: +234-085-2416060 for updates to enable him instruct his secretary to get the money available for his movement.
I have handed him over your vital information with prudent instructions to avoid any mistake in your documentation.
I do look hopefully forward to your swift response.
Attached here is a copy of my picture as you demanded. Note: you made another mistake in my telephone number and i repeat my number +(234)-8034382456. not (+234-803-4382-654).
Best Regards,
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Gov. (C.B.N).
Date: Mon, 22 Oct 2007 13:10:23 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: PROF. JOHN PLS EXPEDIATE ACTIONS.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
CC: barristerfrankmadu@excite.com
Dear Barrister Barrister Frank Madu,
Professor Professor Charles Soludo has put events in motion motion for arrangements and cooperation and discussion. I would like to thank thank him for putting this this together.
I've got one question, how much am I supposed to send? $6400, $2200, $1000, or $3200? You throw numbers around like someone who throws things around.
Just tell me how much to send. I like Barrister Barrister Frank Madu very much. I like Abuja Abuja. I like that he executes his job job.
I did a little reading and I see now that you asked for $3200. I sent the money.
Control Number : 8889-001-2366
Sender's Name : John Francis Reed
I called Barrister Barrister Frank Madu, but the number only reached a very angry and old sounding Chinese woman. +234-085-2416600
So I tried called Professor Professor Charles Soludo to confirm the phone number, but I got the same Chinese woman again! +(234)-803443824456
Maybe I got the wrong country code and I'm calling China and not your glorious African nation?
Please help. I am desperate to get this transaction completed because Professor Professor Charles Soludo doesn't want his secretary to know.
Boston Red Sox,
John F. Reed - Colorado Rockies
ps - I apologize for the model, it was done in only five minutes (5min).
Date: Tue, 23 Oct 2007 02:19:03 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: GET YOURSELF CORRECTED.
To: "John Reed"
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
I have received the copy of the mail you sent to Barrister Frank and I have called him to verify if he received the sum of ($3200) as you stated but he later called me to inform me that he got to the western union office and was informed that the control number has no found match which means you did not send any money. I am a Banker and should know excertly that the correct control is always 12 digits not 11 digit which proves you wrong.
Secondingly I do not really understand what the attachement is indicating here, can you expanciate?.
If you are serious clearify your self and let me hear a good news from you.
Best Regards,
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Gov. (C.B.N).
Date: Tue, 23 Oct 2007 09:34:30 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: GET YOURSELF CORRECTED.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Attn: Prof. Charles Soludo,
Please forgive my mistake. I, too, am a banker and I, too, know excertly that the correct control is always 12 digits, not 11. You are right and it does prove me wrong. I made a mistake and forgot to type in the 12th and final digit. Please forgive me.
I am serious and wish to clearify my self.
I want you to hear good news from me.
Control Number : 8889-001-23664
Sender's Name : John Francis Reed
I forgot to type in the four (4) at the end. I have no excuse. Please forgive me. I can assure you that everything is assured and the transaction can go forward.
Aluminum and titanium,
John F. Reed - I use Beryllium
ps - nevermind that last attachment
Date: Tue, 23 Oct 2007 10:36:28 -0700 (PDT)
From: Send an Instant Message "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: this is your proof
To: "John Reed"
Money Transfer Tracking
W0131 We do not have an order with the provided information. Please verify your information and click Tracking.
Welcome to Western Union
MTCN : 8889001236
Check status of another transfer
Welcome to Western Union
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
Above is the proof of what your are doing, this means you are kidding.
Date: Tue, 23 Oct 2007 14:21:13 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: this is your proof
To: Send an Instant Message "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Attn: Professor Charles Soludo,
I can assure you that I do not know what the problem is with my MTCN number. I walked into Western Union and handed them a check for $3200 (US). I spoke with Henry Weinmenbaumstein. He gave me the form to fill out, I gave him the check, I filled in all the appropriate names, questions, answers, and names.
Henry Weinmenbaumstein seemed, to me, to be a good man and upstanding and reasonable. I gave him the money and the form and he gave me my confirmation numbers and MTCN numbers and I gave them directly to you.
I feel ashamed that the money did not get to you, and I will go there right now and demand my money back. Is there a way I can do this online? That way there will be no mixup and the money will get to you immediately.
Please send my apologies to Barrister Barrister Frank Madu. I know he is a buys and important man and loves Abuja.
Can I send the money online?
Natoma,
John F. Reed - Henry's Hunan
Date: Wed, 24 Oct 2007 02:41:01 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: GET ME CONVINCED.
To: "John Reed"
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
I have taken note of your mail and all your efforts coupled with the jollof rice you prepared for me, that's kind of you, if we can be serious about this you can try MoneyGram as well with the information given already.
Best Regards,
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Gov. (C.B.N).
Date: Wed, 24 Oct 2007 14:35:29 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: GET ME CONVINCED.
To: Send an Instant Message "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Attn: Prof. Charles Soludo,
I'm sorry, but I did not prepare jollof rice for you. Please stop thinking about food and be serious with me for a moment.
I want to get you convinced.
I have taken note of your taking note of my efforts. Please let me assure you again that I am for real and that I am serious and that I am very much wanting to do business.
I do not know why Western Union didn't work. I promise you I will never work with Western Union again.
I went to MoneyGram like you suggested. I filled out a form, then I signed it and handed it over. Then I faxed it in and they gave me a copy of the completed and approved form (attached).
This is twice that I've spent $3200 for this business and I hope that it works this time.
Please tell me if there is anything else I can do to help make this transaction smooth. I want you to be sure that you can trust me. I am a business man and a banker and a professor of highest regard.
Bork-Bork,
John F. Reed - Swedish Chef
Date: Thu, 25 Oct 2007 04:31:40 -0700 (PDT)
From: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Subject: THANKS.
To: "John Reed"
Attn: Prof. John F. Reed,
I have seen a copy of the MoneyGram receipt attached but it is quite unfortunate omited the refrence number and you used my name instead of the name of Barrister Frank personal secretary as given to you, therefore I still consider it as a job, but you should know that in my position I am more then this redicules.
Please stop spending your money any longer and let burry the harchet.
Best Regards,
Prof. Charles Soludo.
Gov. (C.B.N).
Date: Fri, 26 Oct 2007 11:20:42 -0700 (PDT)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: THANKS.
To: "PROF. CHARLES SOLUDO" - electroforeignremittancedept_cbn@yahoo.com
Attn: Attn: Professor Professor Charles Soludo,
Do not consider this a job! If you want to approach this as a proper business man then I suggest you start acting like one! Do not consider this a job! Do not assuce me of redicules!
I AM A SERIOUS BUSINESSMAN!
As they say in my country, "third time is a charm". So, by law, I have to give you three chances. THIS IS YOUR THIRD CHANCE!
You're costing me a lot of money, but the law says I have to try this one more time.
I sent a moneygram, one last time, this time to Barrister Barrister Frank's personal secretary given to me.
If you screw me I will bury the harchet in your ass.
Once again, I sent $3200 of my own money to this business transaction. I don't know who took the other $6400 I spent, but the law says I have to give you a third chance.
Do not make me consider this a job, because you should know that in my position I am more than this redicules.
Be careful.
Good luck.
DOJ,
John F. Reed - FBOI
Date: Sat, 5 Jan 2008 03:51:34 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: TRANSFER AND MANDATE
To: "LOU GOODEN" - lougooden2000@yahoo.com
CC: John Francis Reed
Sir,
We have eventually concluded on the clearance of your fund meanwhile you will have your $15m transfer slip before three hours time from now but before that we were asked to pay for the Payment Final Conclusion Fee with only $158.00 so send it through Obinna Baba Lagos Nigeria and quickly get back to me while we send your $158m transfer datas to both you and your bank to enable you commence withdrawal.
Note your nominated bank details are well programmed.
Kindest Regards,
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,
Central Bank of Nigeria.
Date: Mon, 7 Jan 2008 14:27:56 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: TRANSFER AND MANDATE
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Professor Charles Soludo,
I haven't heard from you in a long while. If you recall, I already sent the Final Conclusion Fee.
I request that you start sending me proof of your sincerity before I start sending more money. First we talk, then talk, and then you disappear. I thought you left and our transactions were not secure.
Then you come back and ask for more money.
I require pictures of you and your wife as proof that you are a family man. A family man is an honest man. Send me these pictures and I will consider sending the $158 Final Conclusion Fee.
Two Girls,
John F. Reed - One Cup
Date: Tue, 8 Jan 2008 00:50:10 -0800 (PST)
From: Send an Instant Message "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
Subject: REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
OFFICE OF ALHAJI UMARU YAR’ADUA GCFR
PRESIDENT, COMMANDER IN CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
ASO-ROCK VILLA ABUJA
ATTN:JOHN REED THE BENEFICARY
REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
I, THE PRESIDENT, COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES, OF THE
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA, ALHAJI UMARU MUSA YARAâ DUA USES THIS
OPPORTUNITY TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR CONTRACT PAYMENT $300,000.00 SHALL BE RELEASED TO YOU TODAY THROUGH THE GOVERNOR PROF:CHARLES SOLUDO.
AS A MATTER OF URGENCY YOU ARE REQUIRED TO SEND TO HIS OFFICE A CONCLUSION FEE OF $150. THROUGH MR.PAUL EKAN ,ADDRES LAGOS NIGERIA.
UPDATE ME IMMEDIATELY YOU SEND ACCORDINGLY SO THAT ALL PROOF OF FUND TRANSFER DOCUMENTS WILL BE SIGNED ACCORDINGLY BEFORE DESPATCHING TO YOU AND YOUR BANK LATEST BEFORE 4.PM.
FINALLY YOU CAN CALL THE GOVERNOR ON HIS DIRECT NUMBER FOR ORAL CLARIFICATION AND TO GIVE HIM THE MTCN FOR IMMEDIATE CONCLUSION OF YOUR TRANSACTION.
CONTACT E-AMIL: governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
TELE NOMBER: +234-7038210000
NAME: PROF:CHARLES SOLUDO(GOVERNOR,CBN.)
CONGRATULATIONS
Yours faithfully,
ALHAJI. UMAR YAR’ADUA GCFR.
PRESIDENT, FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
Date: Wed, 9 Jan 2008 16:55:04 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
CC: governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Mr. President,
First off please allow me to express to you, sir, what an honor it is to speak with you. I'm am truly humbled to converse with you.
Next, please, oh great Mr. President, know that I have already sent Governor Soludo the $150. I believe that Governor Soludo is making an incredible filing error and has somehow missed the $150 I have already sent him.
I have tried calling him several times (+234-7038810000), but there has been no answer.
On a personal note, please let me say that your country of Nigeria is a horrible and disgusting place. But thank heaven that you are now in command it will be a clean and wonderful place again.
Nigeria is a diseased and crime ridden nation, full of thieves and whores, but thanks to you and your glorious policies and wonderful ideas and spectacular outfits and magical hats Nigeria will grow and succeed and shine and reign supreme over all Africa.
For you, kind and gentle and wonderful Mr. President sir guy, I will try to contact Governor Soludo once more.
Mexicali,
John F. Reed - Not Calimexi
Date: Tue, 8 Jan 2008 01:04:18 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: TRANSFER AND MANDATE
To: "John Reed"
Sir,
There is no time for delay , due to the delay so far i have this morning concluded with the presidential approval.You will have the proof of fund deposit as soon as you conclude on release of your fund transfer documents today.So try and send in the conclusion fee $150.through MR. PAUL EKAN LAGOS NIGERIA for immediate conclusion and please send me your direct bank telephone and fax so that they can receive the documents as soon as we conclude today.Meanwhile try and send in the $150. as earlier as possible for you to have confirmation in your bank latest before 4.pm today.
Sincerely,
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,CBN.
NB;You can call me for oral clarifications.+234-7038210000
Date: Wed, 9 Jan 2008 17:01:34 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: TRANSFER AND MANDATE
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Hey Bitch,
It is so good to speak with you again Governor Soludo. It has been too long. As I was just saying with good friend Mr. President of Nigeria (perhaps you've heard of him - he's the president of Nigeria), you are a hard man to get a hold of.
I have already sent the $150 Conclusion Fee. I have tried calling you (+234-7038810000) several times, but you do not answer. You are not a good businessman.
But you are friends with the President of Nigeria, a good personal friend of mine, so I will give you one more chance.
Please send me proof, first, of your friendship with the President. And, please, send me photos of the women in your country. I will only send money to a country where my friend (you) is a friend of the President (Mr. President), and to a country where the women are as beautiful as the morning sun or the midnight stars or the curves of the river great.
Because of your connections with the great President of Nigeria, I will send you the money ONE MORE TIME. But first I want something for my money, and I want those photo proofs that I asked for.
I know that you are worried that Nigeria is overrun with thieves and whores, but fear not. Your president, the President of Nigeria, is a great and good and holy man who will rid Nigeria of the plagues and return it to glory! AMEN!!
You send photos. I send money.
Yellow paper,
John F. Reed - Color Ink Color Ink
Date: Thu, 10 Jan 2008 00:53:58 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
OFFICE OF ALHAJI UMARU YAR’ADUA GCFR
PRESIDENT, COMMANDER IN CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
ASO-ROCK VILLA ABUJA
ATTN:JOHN REED THE BENEFICARY
REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
AS A MATTER OF URGENCY YOU ARE REQUIRED TO PAY THE CONCLUSION FEE OF $150. THROUGH MR.PAUL EKAN ,ADDRES LAGOS NIGERIA. FORWARD TO ME THE DETAILS OF THE MONEY TRANSFER INFORMATIONS IMMEDIATELY. OR YOU CAN CALL THE GOVERNOR ON HIS DIRECT NUMBER.
TELE NOMBER: +234-7038210000
NAME: PROF:CHARLES SOLUDO(GOVERNOR,CBN.)
CONGRATULATIONS
Yours faithfully,
ALHAJI. UMAR YAR’ADUA GCFR.
PRESIDENT, FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
Date: Fri, 11 Jan 2008 02:28:34 -0800 (PST)
From: "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
OFFICE OF ALHAJI UMARU YAR’ADUA GCFR
PRESIDENT, COMMANDER IN CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
ASO-ROCK VILLA ABUJA
ATTN:JOHN REED THE BENEFICARY
HAVE YOU NOT SEND THE REQUIRED FEE? NOTIFY ME WITH THE DETAILS OF YOUR WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER.
CONGRATULATIONS
Yours faithfully,
ALHAJI. UMAR YAR’ADUA GCFR.
PRESIDENT, FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
Date: Fri, 11 Jan 2008 02:29:06 -0800 (PST)
From: "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
OFFICE OF ALHAJI UMARU YAR’ADUA GCFR
PRESIDENT, COMMANDER IN CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
ASO-ROCK VILLA ABUJA
ATTN:JOHN REED THE BENEFICARY
HAVE YOU NOT SEND THE REQUIRED FEE? NOTIFY ME WITH THE DETAILS OF YOUR WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER.
CONGRATULATIONS
Yours faithfully,
ALHAJI. UMAR YAR’ADUA GCFR.
PRESIDENT, FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
Date: Mon, 14 Jan 2008 20:09:23 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: REF:YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
Dear Mr. President,
I'm sorry. I don't speak Liar. I tried to understand what you said, but, as I've already stated, I do not speak Liar.
I tried to translate your last transmission into languages I understand, but the only Liar translators I could find would only translate your message into Whore and Thief - two more languages I do not understand yet seem to congeal perfectly well with the language of your native tongue - the language of Liar.
Anyway, I already sent the requested fees to your country of liars and whores and thieves and I sent the MTCN numbers to your lying, whoring thief governor, and I already sent all the information to you too.
I am very angry. I think the reason I am angry is because you are a liar and a whore and a thief who is just trying to lie to me and whore to me and thief to me.
I sent the money!
Nigeria has fabulous drainage.
Eight-Oh-Eight,
John F. Reed - In The Pee Em
Date: Mon, 14 Jan 2008 06:19:51 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Attn:John Reed
Try and send the $150. through MR. OBINNA BABA ACCOUNTANT with address LAGOS NIGERIA.
As a matter of urgency, you will have your fund delivered to your nominated bank account latest by tomorrow.So to enable us conclude today send in the $150. while we process and give the transfer withdrawal slip to for you possible withdrawing starting from tomorrow.
Note: we have routed your fund and now the US credit monitoring unit are now are now waiting to direct your fund as routed.
However, i wish you a successful payment today so send the $150. for immediate conclusion.
Regards,
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,
Central Bank of Nigeria.
Date: Mon, 14 Jan 2008 20:14:59 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Dearest Governor Soludo,
I think I might have done something wrong. I think, maybe, that I might have, MIGHT, have called your president a liar.
I think, I could be wrong, but I think that after I called him a liar I called him a whore.
Also, since I'm being honest with you, after I called him a liar and a whore I also called him a thief.
See. I'm drunk. Right now. As I write this letter to you I am drunk. Do you know what Whiskey is? Well, let me put it to you this way - my lover sure as hell knows what Whiskey is. Do you know why?
Do you know why my liver sure as hell knows what Whiskey is? My liver knows what Whiskey is because they ran out of Vodka. You've been there before I'm sure.
I am sorry if I offended your President or your nation or your liars or your whores or your thieves.
But you have to believe me.
I sent the $150 already. I sent the MTCN. I'd send more money but I blew all the money I had left on Whiskey, Vodka, hookers, prostitutes, whores, sex workers, and some guy that makes funny baloon animals and baloon hats.
I sent the money, but now I'm drunk.
I love you even if you're a liar and a whore and a thief. I feel bad that your country is full of liars and whores and thieves, but I sent $150 to your country already. Ok?
I SENT IT!
Now send me my money.
Eight Fourteen,
John F. Reed - In The Pee Em
Date: Tue, 15 Jan 2008 01:22:03 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Sir,
As a matter of truth, i can believe you have paid $150. but as a matter of fact, is seem you paid to a wrong and unauthorized person.Therefore,I have taking note of your message and hereby to advice you not to communicate such impostors again. I would have assisted you financially but as a matter of urgency, i will helpyou with $50. so send in $100. through MR. OBINNA BABA with address Lagos Nigeria so send me the MTCN so that we can conclude and send you withdrawal slip on or before 4.pm today try and send via Western Union ormoney gram and forward MTCN for immediate PAYMENT.
Thanks.
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,CBN.
Date: Tue, 15 Jan 2008 15:08:04 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA"
Professor Soludo,
I believe that you believe me. I believe that you believe that I have already paid $150. So why should I pay $100 again! So the same man can steal it from you? And so I can pay $250 instead of $150 like you promised!
YOU ARE A PROFESSOR IN A LAND OF LIARS AND WHORES AND THIEVES!
YOU ARE A GOVERNOR IN A LAND OF LIARS AND WHORES AND THIEVES!
Why would you make a business man on the other side of the world spend $250!!!!!!!
I will not send another $100. That is too much and I have already risked too much.
I like you.
How about $75. If you can find a way to get your bank to accept $75 we can do business.
But I only want to talk to you, not your president. Your president is a liar and a whore and thief and I will not do business with liars or whores or thieves. Maybe sometimes whores, but never thieves or liars.
I LIKE YOU!
I WILL DO BUSINESS ONLY WITH YOU!
If $75 is ok then we can do business.
Whobo?
John F. Reed - Youbo Meebo
Date: Tue, 15 Jan 2008 01:45:05 -0800 (PST)
From: "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
Subject: YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
OFFICE OF ALHAJI UMARU YAR’ADUA GCFR
PRESIDENT, COMMANDER IN CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
ASO-ROCK VILLA ABUJA
ATTN:JOHN REED THE BENEFICARY
You should stop fooling yourself and my office for ilegal collecting of fee. As i advice you the Governior Prof:Charles Soludo is a man of his word and he deserve more honour .
Also i cannot afford to do anything that will joepardise my efforts therefore follow instruction of the paying ministry which the CBN under the control of Prof:Charles Soludo with e-mail:governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com or call his direct line 234-7038210000 for oral clarification.
CONGRATULATIONS
Yours faithfully,
ALHAJI. UMAR YAR’ADUA GCFR.
PRESIDENT, FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
Date: Tue, 15 Jan 2008 15:25:24 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: YOUR FUND TRANSFER.
To: "Presidency Office" - tooffice46update11@yahoo.com
Mr. President,
YOU ARE A LIAR!
YOU ARE A WHORE!
YOU ARE A THIEF!
These are the things that Governor Soludo says about you.
I spoke with Governor Soludo and said I am honored to work with your President Alhaji Umaru.
Governor Soludo says to me, "President Alhaji is a liar. President Alhaji is a whore. President Alhaji is a thief."
I told Governor Soludo, "No he is not."
But then Governor Soludo said, "Yes he is ."
I don't like that kind of talk, so I told Governor Soludo, "No he is not."
To which Soludo responded, "Oh yes he most surely is a liar and a whore and a thief."
That was the last straw. I got really loud on the phone and screamed, "PRESIDENT ALHAJI IS NOT A LIAR OR A WHORE OR A THIEF!" Then I kicked Governor Soludo - I kicked him through the phone.
I want you to know this, Mr. President, that your Governor thinks you are a whore and tells people you are a whore. I know that your country is overrun by whores and is populated with whores and its president is a whore but that doesn't mean your Governor can call you a whore.
I want to do business with you, Mr. President, and only with you. I don't deal with Governors. They are scum. I only deal with Presidents.
If you can assure me that I will never do business with Governor Soludo ever again, I will sent $200 instead of $150 - just never tell Soludo.
I will only do business with the President.
I want to send you $200.
Thirteen Stars,
John F. Reed - Thirteen Stripes
Date: Wed, 16 Jan 2008 01:12:06 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Sir,
I believe you and you must be a honest person because i am a man of my word and my word is my Bond.As a matter of urgency go-ahead and send in the $75. possible before 2.pm through MR. OBINNA BABA with LAGOS NIGERIA and before tomorrow the fund will be in your account.Meanwhile try send me the MTCN via e-mail or call my direct line for faster confirmation as i am now making effort to complete the required sum.
Thanks.
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,
Central Bank of Nigeria.
Code:JOY
Tele: 234-7038210000
Date: Wed, 16 Jan 2008 09:28:35 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Governor Soludo,
I believe you and you must also be an honest person because I, too, am a man of your word and your word is the Bond of Nigeria.
I have attached photocopies of the money I am bringing to the Western Union office, near my office, today.
Mr. Obinna Baba from Lagos, Nigeria will be getting PLENTY of MTCN numbers - believe me. Of course you believe me. You believe me because your word is like James Bond. How's Q?
The money is going out today - I just wanted you to know. Attached is a copy of my $25 bill - I have three of them - and I just wanted you to know I was heading over to the Western Union office RIGHT NOW.
Tell Mr. Obinna Baba to get up off his ass and get ready for some hot, steamy, MTCN lovin'.
Mmmmm.
Artificially Flavored,
John F. Reed - Orchard Grape
Date: Thu, 17 Jan 2008 00:12:30 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Sir,
Right now Mr. Obinna Baba is wating to pick up the MTCN here in my office.Try and send it imediately to avoid further delay.
Thanks.
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,
Central Bank of Nigeria.
Date: Fri, 18 Jan 2008 10:17:18 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
CHUCK!,
Sorry it took me so long to get back to you. I hope you had plenty of food and drinks and whores available to keep Mr. Obinna Baba occupied. What am I talking about, of course you had pleanty of whores - Nigeria is the land of whores.
He's been there, what, two days now? I don't know about you, I know even less about Mr. Obinna Baba, but I could tear through at least a dozen whores in a two day stretch.
Anyway, here's the MTCN number you've been waiting for.
MTCN # 0608197909
You like that?
Mmmmm. I know you do.
Now send me my money!
Woohoo!,
John F. Reed - Investors Gone Wild
ps - I was thinking of making a trip on down to Nigeria to pay a visit to all my investments. Do I have to pay an 'out-of-town' or 'visitor' or 'tourist' or 'vacationer' whore tax when I partake in some of your whores which run rampant in your whore infested country of whores? Or just I just pay the normal whore-rates? Let me know!
pps - Just between you and me, do you have midget whores over there? Don't tell anybody. It's kind of my thing.
Date: Sat, 19 Jan 2008 03:44:07 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Sir,
What about the Test Qutstion and Anwser.Sender's name and address,country for immediate confirmation and to avoid wrong claim.Please reconfirm urgently.
I need you to reconfirm that immediately for immediate confirmation.
Thanks.
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,CBN.
CODE:JOY.
Date: Sun, 20 Jan 2008 07:45:04 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Hey Youdumbsunufabitch,
I sent you the Test Question! I sent your the Answer! I sent you the Sender's Name! I sent you the Address! I sent you the Country For Immediate Confirmation!
What the hell is wrong with you?
If you pull your head out of your mother's ass for two minutes maybe you'll learn something!
I am sorry if I sound angry, but in the United States we take great offense to business partners not paying attention at the end of a transaction. It is customary, especially in South Dakota, for the partners who doesn't pay attention to offer his mother to the other partner.
I demand you offer me your mother. She better be good.
Offer me your mother and I will send all the appropriate information.
I sent the money, but I will not give you the information you ask until you offer me your mother.
Does she cook? She better do windows. She can't watch my tv. She can run behind my car as I drive it. I hope she can sleep standing up because she'll be sleeping in the closet with my coats, vacuum cleaner, and previous partners' mother.
I demand satisfaction,
John F. Reed - Judge, Reception, Couch, Channel 51
Date: Sun, 20 Jan 2008 07:36:20 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Why did you give me an invalid MTCN number.
Kindly reconfirm the mtcn along with the sender's names,address,test question and answer for immediate confirmation.
Note: Your fund will be remitted immediately this amount $75.00 is confirmed so send it accordingly and update for smooth transaction and be rest assured.
Thanks.
Prof:Charles Soludo,
Executive Governor,CBN.
Code:JOY.
Date: Sun, 20 Jan 2008 07:49:39 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Dear Areyouretartedorsomethingyoudumbsunuvabitch,
I JUST DEMANDED COMPENSATION FOR YOUR HORRIBLE PARTICIPATION IN THIS TRANSACTION!
You are a bad business parter and I think you need to go back to Business Partner School.
I demand an apology.
Fake Bicycle,
John F. Reed - Rheneas And The Roller Coaster
Date: Sun, 20 Jan 2008 07:51:38 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: FUND TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
You sound so funy.
My word is my bond, if realy you are true and honest, supply the needed information or your forget e-mailing me as i have no time for hanky-panky game.
Sincerely,
Charles Soudo,
Executive Governor.
Date: Sun, 20 Jan 2008 08:04:43 -0800 (PST)
From: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: TRANSFER.
To: "John Reed"
Sir,
Kindly supply the infor accordingly for the western union to avoid further delay.
Sincerely,
Charles Soludo.
EX.GOVERNOR.CBN.
Date: Mon, 21 Jan 2008 22:36:28 -0800 (PST)
From: "John Reed"
Subject: Re: TRANSFER.
To: "GOVERNOR CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA" - governor_centralbankupdate_nig@yahoo.com
Sir,
You are a poor business man. I am a great business man. You are a poor business man.
I think that you are a bad business man because you choose now, the time at which we are almost finished with our transactions, as the time to be childish.
Even though you have offended me greatly, I must assume it is your lack od intelligence derived from being dropped so often as a baby. I must assume your lakc of energy is due to your having spent all your energies on daily precautions and measures taken to ensure your true sexual preference reamin secret from your family.
You don't want to be exposed for being the big fairy fruit that you and I both know you are. It is difficult to keep something of that magnitude so secret. Right pumpkin?
I will send all the information you wish for the money transfer as soon as possible (ASAP).
First, however, you must do something for me. You must swear to me that Nigeria is the Land of Whores.
Do this for me and I will send forward all requested information.
Life After People,
John F. Reed - Mount Rushmore Makes It
